i promise, i'm finally, almost done playing only la dispute for these past few weeks (my stats are insane)!

i was listening to their split with Touché Amoré (yes, i was screaming like a school girl when this ep came out it's like two super heroes decided to do a team up and kicked asssss!) and the lyrics to this song is kind of where i am right now

I say a drink might help me sleep, I say
I don’t sleep much at all these days, I say it’s cold, 
Besides, I’m broken.
Hard as earth the love of the past,
The worth of the world has frozen
Like the sheet of ice collecting on the windshield of my car.
Where I caught my reflection frozen in the glass,
A perfect broken image of the future I’d envisioned in the past-
Corrupted by fate now, fractured, and fading away.
Replace all I felt promised to me.
To be the one who figured it out,
Who knew what to do,
Who knew how to feel and
Felt that
Love of the past,
The worth of the world,
Just set it ablaze and
Thaw me out.
Dim lit in a room dark red, where I said,
“Can’t seem to break off from the way I felt, but
I guess you understand, man. We had no chance.
I’m tired of fighting with the hand I’ve been dealt.
So, I take the cards they give me
And keep my protest on the inside of my mouth.
If the best I can do ain’t gonna stop what’s coming,
What’s the point in trying to change how the hand plays out?
Don’t we all just die?
When you looked at the light
Did it hurt your eyes?
When you looked at the light
Did it hurt you
Like it hurt me?

appropriately, the song is called HOW I FEEL.

when i think about it too hard, it kind of bums me out. :|
to be honest, the last week has been kind of a misery.
and tomorrow i have to go out in public in nice clothes and be nice to people and talk about research and science and generally act like a normal person.  so, in an attempt to be in better spirits, i'm going to shelve the depressing music (until after our microbe party).  ;)

not sure how much of an improvement this is but i finally got around to listening to The Things We Think We're Missing by Balance and Composure.  I really liked Separation when it came out- i was super into thursday and thrice and rise against when i was in high school and this album reminded me of that.  TTWTWM fell off my radar and i only got around to listening to it now.  and it's great!  i really like Parachutes, Lost your Name, Notice me... almost every song is 5 stars for me.  here's the official music video for Reflection:

and here's some of my own balance and composure:

playing in the rain





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